First Day of Anxiety

Today was really my first day of Anxiety.  It happened when I heard two rumors.  The first rumor I heard was that my Torts Prof only gave 3 As last semester. 

I guess that's possible.  On a forced curve, he should give about 5, but if he had an unusually bad crop of papers, maybe he gave fewer than the max allowed.

The second was that my Legal Research and Writing Prof gave everybody Cs.

Now, my rational self is saying that this is all BS and is probably as valid as most rumors, which is to say, a smattering of truth, surrounded by a sea of BS that produces no good information at all, but maximum shock value.

However, my emotional self got a little spooked.

Honestly, I suspect that the root of those rumors would be that only 3 people got an A that somebody knew of or that it seemed like "everybody" got a C based on an informal survey of people in the class.  Who knows.

I also suspect that the folks who got really good grades probably had a high percentage of the types of people who would keep their lips sealed about it.

Still, right now, I'm starting to come to the realization that I need to do a lot more work.  I'm not doing enough.  I'm keeping up with the reading, but personally, I think that's only good enough to get you a C, or if you're lucky, a low B.  I need to do better.

A lot of it is time.  I volunteered to help with Logan's football team "when I could", but that's turning into an everyday thing.  It never ceases to amaze me how not-involved most parents are.  I just can't split and leave the coaching to the head coach when he'd be the only guy there.  That's too much to ask of him. 

I also need to get a lot more productive with my time.  Need to fill up the slack time during the day.  That means using lunches, and spare hours here and there to study. 

I'm not really behind, but I know I have to put in more work if I hope to do better than most of the class.  It's not a disaster if I finish with middling grades, but that's not my goal right now.  After 1L Fall grades come out, I may adjust my course, but in the mean time, I would like to see how well I can do at this.

I am positive that I will finish 1L year as a full-time student.  Beyond that, though?  I'm leaving all options on the table, including perhaps dropping back to part-time status.  I wouldn't say that the time involved in this is excessive, but it is considerable and it's putting a real cramp on a lot of things I used to do.  That's something to consider later.  In the mean time, I need to finish up some reading and go to bed.